Saturday, August 6, 2016

Weekend Writing Warriors 8-7

I'm sharing a snippet this week from my August 16 release, Stars Between Us.

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A few days together before he leaves Farport Space Station— Odessa, a young woman with a past, and Veras, a young man with a future.


Snippet:

“Odessa,” barked Mr. Collier. 

Odessa looked at the man who never liked her, feeling that useless, helpless feeling of wanting approval. She shrugged the feeling off, impatient with herself. She would never fit into conventional society, no point in wishing she could. 

“You saw my son last night.” 

“Yes, Sir, we had dinner at the Bread Bowl.” 

“I don’t want to deal with you again.”

10 comments:

  1. They must have a past. Very curious!

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  2. I think he'd better get used to the idea of dealing. Nice conflict, Melisse!

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  3. Why do I get the feeling that last sentence might be seen more as a challenge than an instruction? :) Good conflict.

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  4. Well, he seems unpleasant. Hope she can get over wanting his approval quickly- though I know the feeling. :-)

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  5. Well he's certainly curt and unfriendly, not to mention interfering! I don't like him, can you tell? Very effective snippet!

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  6. Hooks the reader with questions. Well done.

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  7. It would seem that Mr. Collier knows something of Odessa's past, which you hinted about.

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  8. A lot of information delivered in a few sentences, and it didn't feel like an infodump. Nicely done!

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  9. Great cover! Sounds like he has just verbalized what she's probably thinking about now... Great snippet!

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